Monday, February 21, 2011

Gettin' Right

So, here I am yet again. For the past week or so, I've kept starting a post and then deleting it all, mostly because I don't know where to begin, so I suppose I'll just jump in the middle of things. Things are starting to get where they need to be eating wise. The last four days have been better (as opposed to good). I'm finding some really yummy healthy new recipes that I can't wait to share with you all! If there are any of you left! I want to get back into the blogging world again, I really miss it, and all of you!

My recovery from shoulder surgery has been a struggle, as I'm still in about the same amount of pain as before surgery. I've also developed some hip pain on the opposite side, I swear it feels like I'm falling apart! I'm too young for this. It's been a good kick in the butt for me, though, as I KNOW I wouldn't be in this much trouble if I'd lost the weight I need to lose. The good news is, I'm turning it into a motivation. I went running the other day for the first time in a LOONNNGG time. Now I've made it through the first week of the C25k program. It was rough and I've certainly lost all of the progress I'd made, but it really feels so good to be MOVING again. Of course, because of the hip I can barely move afterwards, but I'm taking baby steps. this morning I even got up at 5:30 to run, which is a HUGE thing for me. I can't deny that I feel so much better, so much HAPPIER when I'm exercising.

The thing that I know I need to work on the most is my mindset. I need to get right mentally and stop letting my weight and my disappointment in myself be the focus of my life. For awhile when I was on a roll last year, I was really in a good spot. The thing that changed it all? Going off of that water pill and seeing a gain on the scale. Even though I KNEW it wasn't a "gain" I let the scale dictate everything and lead to another weight loss downfall. So, this time, I'm going to focus a lot of energy on getting right not only with eating and exercising, but also with my outlook.

So, that's where I am! I hope all of you are experiencing great successes, with weight loss and otherwise!

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Very quick check in

Yesterday was good! I ended with my calories around 1700, which is a little higher than I want to average, but MUCH better than the past few weeks. Yay! More to say, I'll post later!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Self Destruction

"When you have children, you lose the right to self destruct." -Oprah

That is EXACTLY what I've been doing, self destructing. The pressure around our house these last months has been immense between my shoulder surgery, DH's heart scare, and job issues. Instead of dealing with the stress in a healthy way, I ate. A lot. Of Everything. Unless it was green, or good for you, then I didn't. Ok, that's a little extreme. I did have some vegetables and fruit, but, mainly, I made some horrid food choices. I also failed to move my body in any meaningful way. The scale is reflecting it.

More important than the scale, though, is how it's affecting my life. I have no energy, I'm unhappy, I feel generally bad, my clothes don't fit, my skin feels icky. I feel icky. Lately, I've even found myself not wanting to play with the kids, just wanting to lay around. That's not acceptable. At all. I have no other choice but to start again. Make good food choices, MOVE, get in my water, get healthy. After all, it's only failure if I quit, right? I've lost the right to self destruct.

Exercise is a little trickier than normal, because, unfortunately, the shoulder is in the same shape that it was pre-surgery. But, I can walk. I'm going to get back to walk/jogging tonight and I have to promise myself and you guys, right here and now, that I will not let it get to me when it hits me how badly I've let myself go, when I can't walk as far or jog as long. One foot in front of the other, that's all it takes.

For my blogging buddies, I've been keeping up with you! I'm SO proud of all your successes!