Friday, April 8, 2011
Not about weight loss....ok, that's a lie, I am scared about weight loss, about not losing weight no matter how hard I try, and about losing weight and not finding happiness along the way. Today, though, I'm scared about my health. Yesterday was follow-up #2 with the orthopedist for my shoulder. It still hurts.....bad. I'm at the same level of pain I had before the surgery and I was really hoping yesterday would bring some answers. I did not like what I heard, however. The doctor said that there is "nothing structurally wrong" with my shoulder, and he thinks maybe there's an auto-immune issue going on, specifically mentioning thyroid and rheumatoid arthitis. He ordered some labs and I should know more next week. I'm terrified of what I might find out as a result of those tests, and I'm terrified that I won't find out anything and this pain won't go away. I'm also a little mad...or...a lot mad, at myself for letting my body get this way.