It's been awhile since I've had a meaningful post. I apologize. Things have been downright crazy in my life, but hopefully we're settling down! I was doing ok eating-wise.
What's that? You noticed that I said "was," huh? Well, I was :) That is, until this weekend. Unfortunately, everything that could go wrong DID go wrong this weekend. The details aren't important (well, they are important, but not publicly publishable). Long story short, I got my feelings hurt a LOT this weekend. On several different occassions and by people who are closest to me. It all boils down to the fact that all weekend I felt as if everyone was putting me and my needs last.
So what did I do? Lost it eating wise. I am SUCH an emotional eater and when I'm hurting, I just seem to do more damage to myself by throwing caution to the wind. It wasn't pretty, the calorie counts weren't good. In fact, I haven't even entered yesterday's counts because I don't want to face it. I'm going to today, though, because I have to own it.
The good news is, I'm learning and I'm growing. Although my control was obliterated this weekend, I didn't go completely off the deep end. It wasn't as bad as it could have been, I was able to recognize what was happening and to stop myself from letting it go completely out of control. Also, I'm not kicking myself or talking negatively. I'm just picking myself up and moving on. These are steps in the right direction....right?
Hope everyone is doing fabulously!
It amazes me that as emotional eaters when people treat us poorly we join in on the fun. If they are mean to me...I'm going to be mean to me too. It seems like we think we deserve it. I totally relate to you. I lost 83 lbs one time and was feeling pretty darn confident...I went "back home" for Christmas and with one swoop of the tongue, I was brought down in the dirt. What did I do? I ate and ate and ate.....gaining every pound back until I hit my all time high of 290. It's a tough cycle to break and I'm still working on the how to....
ReplyDeleteHang in there.
My favorite quote at the moment is not from someone famous but it is a great one. I have applied it unilaterally to various aspects of my life and it is totally applicable here:
ReplyDelete"the focus you need is not to dwell on what you haven't been able to do, given your situation; rather look at how much you can get accomplished..."
Keep the focus ahead like you are doing, and you'll be great :)
I have always been an emotional eater too...its strange how things seem to be changing in that aspect for me, too...looks like we're both growing!
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you were hurt and am proud of you for putting the brakes on!
Emotional eating is so hard!!!! Way to catch it :) Good luck girl.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear you had a rough weekend. I understand the emotional eating thing...what I'm finding is that when I'm not self-medicating with eating I'm a whole lot more temperamental and moody. Still haven't figured out how to overcome that. Well, part of the journey, I guess...hope things turn around for you soon!
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